And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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