Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
