I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize
