last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
i think i have two assholes
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
