that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
Randomize
