Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
Randomize
