So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
Randomize
