Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
Randomize
