when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
Randomize