You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
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