So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
Randomize
