My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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