so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
Randomize
