Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
Randomize
