You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
When did we convert life to cartoon?
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
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