I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
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