what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
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