yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
I'm so tired of dating women who lie about their age. You show up feeling like you need to follow them around with a dust pan and a broom.
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
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