May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
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