didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!
I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
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