I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
Randomize
