8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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