i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
zippers are such a cool invention
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
Randomize
