I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
Randomize
