Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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