Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Randomize
