How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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