i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
