my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
We need to rekindle our bromance
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
