ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
Randomize
