ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Randomize
