I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
Randomize
