You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
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