pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
Randomize
