She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
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