Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
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