She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Randomize
