people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
Randomize
