we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Randomize
