just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
Pants are for mortals
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Randomize
