you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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