? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize