i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
You made out with two different species that night
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Randomize
