I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
Randomize
