I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
Randomize
