who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
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