he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
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