Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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