let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
