I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
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