I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Randomize